You’ve definitely heard about it. You’ve probably talked about it with girlfriends or you’ve read books or articles discussing the nine types, but what is the Enneagram all about and what does it mean for your motherhood?
Suzanne Stabile joins us to share her motherhood story and a lot of information about the Enneagram, an ancient typology system that is finding new popularity as a tool that can transform the way you interact with others and understand yourself.
The Enneagram is about how you see and you can never change how you see. All you can do is change what you do with how you see. And I think we expect other women to be more like us than they are. And I think we struggle to accommodate difference because when we're tired, insecure, amd over-committed, then we settle for sameness. But, there needs to be recognition that there's not one right way to do things. There's not one method to follow. There's not one way of being a mom.
Suzanne is an internationally acknowledged Enneagram master. She has authored acclaimed books on the topic and has her own podcast that goes in-depth on the different types. But, as a believer and a mom of four adult children, she brings wisdom and perspective to parenting in light of the Enneagram.
Parenting is really, really tricky. I don't think we ever know what the loudest voice in (our kids’) day is. Often it's not ours. And I think grace is covering all of us and it falls on all of us equally. There are moments when we just need to stand under that grace and with an open heart and pure intentions and do the best we know how to do for ourselves and for one another.
We can’t possibly answer all of your Enneagram questions, but I hope this episode excites you for how this tool can bring unity and grace to relationships with your kids, with other moms and with your spouse. If you want to go deeper in learning about the Enneagram, Suzanne has you covered with her trainings and online resources available at her website.
What we chat about:
- Suzanne’s family background and experience with divorce and living as a single parent of three. How she met her current husband of 31 years and her parenting journey.
- Enneagram types as they relate to mothering
- Type 3, 7 and 8 are aggressive numbers on the Enneagram. They think/do dominant and their challenge is to bring up feelings.
- How to use the Enneagram to unite moms and not increase divides
- The Enneagram is about how we see. We cannot change how we see, only what we do with what we see.
- Types 4, 5 and 9 are withdrawing numbers
- Types 1, 2 and 6 are dependent numbers
- Discussion of the nine types and how they act/react
- Your Enneagram number is determined by motivation and not by behavior
- It’s not a good idea to try and type your children on the Enneagram or to tell them what you think they are.
- Thinking of the Types as Animals: Ones are Worker Bees. Twos are Kangaroos. Threes are Eagles. Fours are Butterflies, Fives are Owls, Sixes are Bunny Rabbits. Sevens are Monkeys, Eights are Lions and Nines are Turtles.
- The three stances: aggressive, dependent and withdrawing. The triads: feeling, thinking and doing.
- Knowing more about the Enneagram won’t keep us from making mistakes
- Grace covers the places we fall short
Connect with Suzanne:
How Each Enneagram Type Reflects God's Character :
(presented by Jenn Jett at the Enneagram at Work Session presented by Polished Ministries)
- Goodness and Rightness
- Love and Care
- Hope and Radiance
- Creativity and Depth
- Wisdom and Truth
- Faithfulness and Courage
- Joy and Abundance
- Power and Protection
- Peace and Oneness
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